If you stay in any business long enough, you’ll have stories
to share. Working with children generates stories that are remarkable
for their freshness, innocence and hilarity. Milton Pediatrics staff
members Ann Marie Horrigan and Cathy Mahoney share some of their
favorite kids quotes and anecdotes:
“I’m sorry. I can’t pee in a cup. I’m
only allowed to pee in a toilet.”
Reception desk: “What would you like?” [question
posed in reference to the sticker basket]
Response: “A ham sandwich.”
Overheard: “Daddy, I dreamed about you last night. Do you
remember?”
Receptionist answers the phone [after a long day]: “Can
you hold me, please?”
New mother, considering a trip: “Can my baby fly?”
A mother: “The Biblical cord fell off!”
Child: “Thank you for taking my blood pleasure.”
Child: “I need a damn-baid.”
Child: “Do I have chicken-pops?”
Nurse: “Please pee in the cup.”
Child: “They’re not going to make me drink it, are
they?”
Nurse: “Do you know what “urine” is?”
Child: “Oh yes, it’s 1994.”
Child, to staff: “Do you have kids?”
Staff: “No, not yet.”
Child: “Good, because kids are really hard. Just ask my
mother.”
Child [during hearing screening]: I can’t hear the beep.
But I can hear my sister at the door.”
Dr. Niloff: “Get undressed.”
Child: “What? I’m under arrest?”
Child: “I’m here for my shocks.”
Child [shivering, entering the office on a winter day]: “Mommy,
my teeth are biting me.”
Child [sick with a sore throat]: “Can you call the Fire
Department to take the fire out of my throat?”
Child [after doctor completed exam]: “Mommy, why didn’t
that man just fix me instead of talking?”
